1. |
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I won’t let you hurt me
Anymore
I won’t let you hurt me
Anymore
If you try to find me
I’ll board up my door
I won’t let you hurt me
Anymore
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2. |
Knife like a Spile
04:35
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I’m still awake as the red dawn comes down on me
The road stretches away as I lean my head out
The window
Watch me forced
Out of my body
Tear me away
From the screen I look out
I sit at a table with a glass I want to tip over
That hovering
Feeling I
Want to destroy you
Help me escape
Through the dark night with fire burning
Collapse as I bleed into the hall
From the knife like a spile
That hole you made
Inside me still
I want to destroy you
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3. |
Dark and Endless Fog
04:12
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Oh of all the roads I walked along
This one is the darkest that I roamed
Not one headlight here to guide me home
Heaven knows oh heaven knows I am lost
There’s nothing here but a dark and endless fog
And when the monsters came I could ward them off
With my shield and fiery, heavy sword
But I am wounded now I keep bleeding on
The ground, I made a trail that they can follow
There’s something there but I can’t see cause the fog
When I lose the fight
When they come for me
They won’t find nothing but a cavity
There’s nothing there but an empty, sunken house
There’s nothing there but the bridge where we both sat
There’s nothing there but the university
There’s nothing there but a dark and endless fog
There’s nothing there but the place I used to live
There’s nothing there but a piece of myself
There’s nothing there but the university
There’s nothing there but a dark and endless fog
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4. |
Get You Out
03:36
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Drifting like clouds overhead
A phantom, phantom
Conjured to haunt me late at night
In the hallway with a candle
And I can’t get you out
Still I fight sorrow and the fear
With prayer and burning
Pages of poems I had read
And nettle from the garden
But I can’t get you out
No I can’t get you out
I had left you to die
You limped back home through the night
Through the night
And I can’t get you out
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5. |
Blackfly
04:44
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I’ve been a wounded traveler
For a decade and a year
I could wander through the woods
But you call me back, “come back”
To the old cul-de-sac
In the morning with the blackfly
That swarms and swallows me up
Among trillium and flowering redbud
A thousand yard stare
Sees below and through
Don’t make me cut it off
Don’t make me lose it all
To the dark, wet road
With no stars that shine on me
You approached as I withdrew
Took the spile and drove it through
“It’s only wood”
“It’s only wood”
It’s only my heart
It’s only my heart
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6. |
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Please can you leave me alone
Please can you leave me alone
Please can you leave me alone
Supplication of the Maple
Beg and beg but I’m not able
Lay my head on something stable
Supplication of the Maple
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7. |
Photosynthesis
02:22
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Can I make it out
Of this hell somehow
Then the stars would shine
On my path again
I like to stay lost
Somewhere you can’t find
In a frozen pasture
As the dark night falls
Fighting once again
Pills and protein shakes
Cold impermanence
Through a filtered light
Sunlight sugar day
No it’s not too late
Help me recreate
All the leaves in Spring
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8. |
Sugaring
03:57
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Can’t stop me sugaring
There’s money beside the bed
Tapped myself clean again
For no good reason
All love is gone and dead
Won’t see me round here again
Something’s been happening
Guess I’m in trouble now
Cause I can’t feel nothing
No I can’t feel nothing
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9. |
Wherever I Go
03:29
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I found you
In the wild
I bet you
Get around
I’ve fought so long I can’t take no more I can’t hold
No more inside of me here and wherever I go
I go
Hey honey
I’m so tired
My head spins
From denial
There’s something else out there I can never control
So evil it follows me out wherever I go
I go
Wherever I go
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10. |
Evaporate
04:27
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The morning came stark and blood red
The compulsion to repeat
It birthed again something I’d regret
Cause the loop inside of me
Kept me blank and suffering
Kept me weak and turning in
At least I knew that I was lost
When I held your hand the next morning
So I turned inside always hoping for
No more dreams of constantly running
Through a field or alleyway
Far from all the same mistakes
I must have known the difference
Just flame on a boiling pot
But during that time I forgot
My hands my body reaching for
a new way to boil me down
The fresh wound sugar syrup blood
Is dripping on the ground
You could not evaporate
All the love inside of me
You could not evaporate
All the love inside that shaped me
You could not evaporate
All the love inside of me
You could not evaporate
All the love inside that shaped me
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11. |
To Lead Me Home
04:50
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Home, to lead me
Am I strong enough
Am I ready for
Am I resolute
Am I liable
Who’s to know?
A ghost, a wounded traveler
Through cities and woods I’ve gone
To distance myself from aching fear
I wander in search of my home
Got to press on
Let the wall form
It’ll go away I tell myself
Like a wave or a broken arm
An ache burrowed in, it never leaves
A hole tearing through my side
I can feel it form around me
I can feel it form around
Home, home
Am strong enough?
Can I give it up?
Have I suffered enough?
To let it go
To lead me home
to lead me home
to lead me home
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12. |
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